I spend way too much time on the net. Not a night goes by that I’m in the chat rooms. I feel bad that I waste so much time on the net, but I can’t seem to stay away from it. It’s affected my school quite a bit too. I was taking 2 classes at the beginning of the semester but now I’m only taking 1 because I wasn’t keeping up with my work. That’s not really all because of the net though. I just can’t get myself to sit down and study. I’m constantly distracted. I’m even behind in the 1 class that I have left. For example, tonight I went to the library because I can usually get a little bit done there because there aren’t as many distractions, but I got there and sat for like 30 mins and didn’t get any studying done and I decided to leave. I thought I could do it at home but since I’ve been home I haven’t touched my books. I’ve been online since. The worst thing is I don’t even have a job and I can’t get anything done, nor do I have any kind of social life.
I haven’t gone out of the apartment and done anything for months. I barely talk to anyone outside of my family. I have a friend that comes over maybe once a week and hangs out with me for a little bit but that’s it. I never talk to anyone at school. I go to my one class and sit in the very back and don’t say a word, while just about everyone else in the class seems to get along with each other pretty well. They are always talking to each other before and after class. At least when I was working I would get out of the apartment more and away from the computer, and I would socialize a little bit with some people at work. I do have a job interview tomorrow, so hopefully that goes well. I’m not so sure I’ll like the job though and it won’t take too much out of my time.
Another problem is I sleep too much, and I feel tired even when I’ve slept a lot. I take a pretty long nap everyday, even if I get a good nights sleep. I hate sleeping so much. It seems like I always feel real tired about the time I need to do my school work too.
Sometimes I think I should get rid of the computer, but I think that may just make some things worse than better. The computer helps me cope with my shyness and I would have absolutely nothing to do without it. Plus I have met some really cool people on the net and I would miss them a lot. That would be really depressing for me. I feel like I’ll never make it through school at the rate i’m going. I’ve only been completing 2 classes a semester and this semester only 1. If I can’t handle a full load of classes I’ll never make it. I feel that moving to some place new would be one thing that would help me out a lot. I’ve been living here my whole life and it would be nice to start fresh somewhere else.