Sometimes I just want to shrivel up and die. Because it really wouldn’t make any difference to anyone if I were here or if I were dead. I have always struggled with shyness and as I have gotten older it has been harder to make friendships. I’ve read books, smiled more, and been supportive to the few people do know, but nothing I do makes any difference. I may receive a brief message back or receive a note saying “we should get together sometime,” but nothing ever comes of it. Why is it so easy for other people to develop companionship? I feel like I’m doing something terribly wrong. I must be, or else I wouldn’t be so alone. Every day I wonder what is wrong with me and why I can’t have the type of friendships or bonds that I hear about and see everyday. I truly have tried to be positive and supportive to the people around me and it hasn’t been good enough. I don’t know what to do anymore.