When should one tell a female you are attracted to that you are still a virgin?

When one gets involved with a female, when is it OK to tell them you are still a virgin because of your shyness and moral values? Should you even mention it? I am satisfied with my virginity until that special female comes along, I do not know how they may think about me when they find out about my purity. Am I too concerned about this? I think this situation is harder on males because the media portrays the “normal” male as being sexually very experienced.


  1. In my experience, it is best to save this conversation until you have a solid relationship and know each other very well.

    Some people might judge you as strange or weird if this information were revealed before they really got to know you.

    When you do find that special person, your previous sexual experience or inexperience will not matter.

  2. Here’s a view from the female perspective. If I was dating a guy that was really special, I think a good time to bring up the subject would be during a conversation about the most important values to each of us. So many people look for the right person by asking what the other person likes to DO and what interests them, rather the question of their VALUES.

    Values are the feelings that are most important to a person. Money is not a value, for example, but the freedom or security that money provides is. “Moving towards values” are always the most important feelings a person wants to feel. Some examples are love, compassion, connection, contribution, freedom, security, integrity, honesty, fun.

    Then there are also the most important feelings a person wants to avoid. Those are “moving away from values.” Some examples are depression, anger, resentment, guilt, shame.

    When you feel the person you are with shares your most important values, then you will feel safe and comfortable enough to share with them about your virginity.

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